Analysis · Floor speech · beta

Marcy Kaptur

337 words · 21 sentences · 35 clauses

Statement grade
D
45 / 100, held down by Signal
A score under 50 is red. Choose a measurement to see where it lost points and why; choose it again to clear.
Greeting 5%Positioning 69%Anecdote 3%Claims 15%Thanks 8%

This view breaks the statement into its steps and names what each one does.

Mr. Speaker, Greeting · 18 wordsI rise today to honor the life of Paul Hollenbeck, an architect, mentor, and rare lifelong community builder.Greeting Positioning · 78 wordsHis precious insights to build progress forward in every corner of our city of Toledo is unparalleled. Paul was an astounding, creative, humble citizen, and he embodied the community’s hopes in every nook and cranny, and he rarely got attention. He was very, very humble. He didn’t look for notoriety. He believed deeply that places matter because people matter. He spent his life proving that belief brick by brick, neighborhood by neighborhood, project by project. He was unrelenting.Positioning Anecdote · 10 wordsI knew Paul as a friend and as a doer.Anecdote Positioning · 19 wordsHe didn’t just talk about civic responsibility. He lived it, and he set an example for others to follow.Positioning Claims · 40 wordsThrough his leadership in creating the Toledo Design Collective, his vision for downtown Toledo, 1or his quiet mentorship of young architects and community leaders, he reimagined the redevelopment of urban spaces and neighborhoods, literally rebuilding America in this new century. Positioning · 70 wordsHe breathed new life into every corner of our community. Paul always demonstrated a focus on the future, and that good design for people is about dignity, access, opportunity, and respect for our built environment. He understood that cities are living places, shaped by generosity and care, and he gave Toledo both. Paul brought people together, listened closely, and always asked how we could do better for the next generation.Positioning Claims · 12 wordsHe leaves behind the Design Collective, The Collaborative building, 2and revitalized neighborhoods. Positioning · 64 wordsMore importantly, he leaves behind a grateful family, grateful friends, a grateful community, and a civic spirit we all can carry forward by innovating and caring for the precious legacy of our built environment in the largest fresh watershed in the entire Great Lakes.3 Paul Hollenbeck’s legacy will live on in the voices, the dreams, and the successes that have happened across our region.Positioning Thanks · 26 wordsI say to his family, to his friends, and to the architects with whom he spent so much of his life: Congratulations. Job well-done, Paul Hollenbeck.Thanks

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